We Write What We Know

I had lived one life with my face turned from the sun,
breathing icy winds and my father’s sin.
He is gone now but his fingerprints
remain a stain upon my broken bones.
My sister traded his midnight hugs for an opium exit;
her ashes instead of his lashes.
I took my refuge in dark shadows and withered.

I told…once.
Was rewarded with a year sabbatical in a red brick asylum,
bought and paid for with my mother’s silence.
She collected her ransom daily/offered up her womb’s fruit
to feed him like grapes to Caesar’s gaping maw.
She furnished her home with lost innocence
and found comfort in our cries.
She is buried now and I am robbed of my mourning.

Unearth me when tomorrow comes.
Set my broken feet upon polished stones;
let ascending steps carry me home.
My screams no longer echo from the mountaintops
My dreams no longer tether my pain.
I am not healed, but I feel, and my words anoint
my open wounds.

Descent into Silence

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Caught in a flame, and scorched by fire
The searing heat of dark desire
A life for most part innocent
Now lay shattered, scorched, and rent
And on this day to never set
The Sun reveals what she can’t forget
There are no tears still yet to fall
For in this act, she lost it all
What still constricts this child’s laughter
What further harm awaits hereafter
Horrors endured in silent fear
One day stretched out into a year
A year to ten, and now a life
Lies severed by one day of strife
And now confined behind a wall
In silent screams, we watch her fall
Into a pit of pain and bile
All to whet a taste most vile
Malevolent and deadly sour
Another child lost to baseless power

Silent and Eternal

I still love you; still need you every day
just to breath, to rise and be alive.
But you must not expect me to
ramble on about the world outside
or the pain inside; I am not wired that
way.
Take comfort in my silence and my nearness to you,
it’s all I can do with what is left within.
You need validation, and I can give you that
I just can’t give you insight; I have none.
“It’s a man thing!” you cry, but I
am as far from that as you are from my words.
It’s a sad thing, and I would wish it not so,
but it’s the one thing I don’t possess.
If you must embrace more than my face
then, please, take the time to read what I
write. It will inform you, though probably not
warm you. For that, fall into my spent arms.
They will always be there for you.
“You don’t love me, you don’t love me,” daily
goes the triad. I comb your hair and caress
your skin near the fire, and for hours my eyes
lock upon yours. We simply spell differently,
see?
I will live my life upon one knee, if in doing so
you could understand. What I know about love
I’ve gathered from your touch, your voice, your
grace.
I can only give you everything. Please don’t ask
for more.