The insidiousness of life is that it constantly presses upon you;
it is unrelenting in its demands that you nurture and refine it.
It evolves, with or without your consent, so there is no rest,
no time to simply put it on cruise control enjoy the passing of time.
For me, every breath is a nuisance; every step is a cursed journey
saddled with failed expectations and societal derision.
I never belonged to this world, nor has it offered itself to me,
and the contempt with which I hold its false promises
eats at my guts like ravens nibbling away at my flesh.
Where others are guided by the soft-bent wings of angels,
I am weighed down by the relentless nagging of demons;
wicked little imps who mock my waking hours and torment my sleep.
There is not a grave dug deep enough to bury my sorrows,
nor do I seek any forgiveness for my sorry state.
I will wash away the stench of my miserable existence
with endless cups of liquid absolution, and in my drunken state,
I will stumble through somehow.
Tomorrow’s sunrise may warmly embrace the multitudes;
each with their cheerful dispositions and infernal optimism.
I, on the other hand, will wither beneath the heat,
thirsting constantly for the darkness beneath a waning moon,
for it is in darkness that my soul finds its true voice.
This was a poem from years ago. Kenzie, I do hear the footsteps of an angel.
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That response made me smile!
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So moving and far to easy for me to relate to though I do not escape with ‘liquid absolution’ or darkness for i found both to make me far worse. I hope things get better for you and that writing is a good outlet for how you feel 🙂
The line that really got me was
‘There is not a grave dug deep enough to bury my sorrows’
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just read your previous comment of it being an old comment. glad you are no longer in that dark place 🙂
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You have no idea how much I appreciate your not only reading my poems, but taking the valuable time to comment so thoroughly when something touches you. I am so honored that you follow my writing. Thank you!
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Your work seems to tell of how i’m feeling almost better than my own words can. Thank you for writing such moving work
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